Explore Somatic Sex Coaching Frequently Asked Questions
Understanding Somatic Sex Coaching
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"Somatic" comes from the Greek word soma, which means the living body experienced from within. In a practice setting, somatic means focusing on your sensations, body awareness, and nervous system responses.
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Sexology is the multidisciplinary study of human sexuality, covering its biological, psychological, emotional, and social aspects. It looks at how humans experience pleasure, desire, intimacy, sexual health, relationship dynamics, and bodily responses across the lifespan.
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Somatic sexology is an evidence-informed approach to intimacy that bridges sexology with body-centred practices. Somatic sexology uses physical tools—such as breath, movement, touch, sound, and awareness—to help you connect with your nervous system, move out of stress mode, build body confidence, and expand your capacity for pleasure.
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Somatic sex coaching is an action-oriented, educational process that applies somatic sexology principles in a fully clothed, collaborative space. There is no nudity involved. Working individually or as a couple, a coach guides you through non-judgmental exercises to help you unlearn unhelpful sexual scripts, release performance pressure, navigate mismatched desire, and build practical skills for pleasure, consent, presence and communication.
As a Certified Somatic Sex Coach (ISS), I offer sessions to individuals and couples via Zoom to clients across New Zealand and around the world (excluding the USA)
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Sex coaching is an educational, skill-building practice focused on present-moment body awareness, nervous system regulation, and experiential learning. It is not psychotherapy, marriage counselling, or medical treatment
Therapy generally diagnoses and treats mental health conditions, clinical dysfunction, or past psychological trauma.
Medical Care diagnoses and treats underlying physical pathology, disease, or anatomical concerns.
Coaching works as an adjunctive space to learn practical tools, explore boundaries, and rebuild bodily trust. If you are experiencing physical pain, pelvic floor dysfunction, or underlying medical conditions, medical clearance (such as from a GP or pelvic floor therapist) is required before starting coaching sessions.
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As a certified practitioner and member of the Somatic Sex Educators Association of Australasia (SSEAA), I adhere strictly to the SSEAA Code of Ethics and Conduct.
My primary commitment is to your well-being, safety, and agency. In practice, this means:
Safe & Consensual Space: Creating an environment where consent is explicit and your boundary choices are fully honored as you explore embodiment.
Client-Centered Boundaries: Maintaining clear professional boundaries free of dynamic power plays, sensual gratification, or authority, keeping the entire focus on your personal growth.
Duty of Care & Ongoing Growth: Upholding a strong duty of care to the wider community through continuous personal development, clinical reflection, and self-care.
About Sessions
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All coaching sessions are held online via Zoom, allowing you to participate comfortably from your own space, whether you are located in Taupō, across New Zealand, or internationally (excluding the USA)
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Coaching is open to individuals (people with vulvas/women and people with penises/men) and couples. I work with clients navigating sexual anxiety, low desire, performance pressure, body disconnect, or communication barriers. All genders, identities, sexual orientations, and relationship structures are welcomed and respected.
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Medical clearance is recommended whenever a sexual challenge might have an underlying biological, structural, or hormonal cause. I strongly advise seeing a GP, urologist, or gynecologist first if you are experiencing:
Unexplained or New Physical Pain: Any persistent, sharp, or burning pelvic/genital pain during or after sex (such as sudden onset dyspareunia, vulvodynia, or pelvic floor trauma).
Sudden Changes in Function: Rapid or severe changes in erectile function, sudden loss of sensation, or unexpected changes in ejaculation.
Hormonal or Systemic Shifts: Symptoms tied to thyroid imbalances, perimenopause, low testosterone, or recovery from pelvic/prostate surgery, injury, or severe infection.
Medication Side Effects: Changes in libido or arousal following new prescription medications (such as SSRIs/antidepressants or blood pressure drugs).
Somatic sex coaching operates as an educational and body-based practice to support your emotional and nervous system well-being—it does not replace medical diagnosis, physical therapy, or medical treatment.
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Somatic sex coaching is personalised to your needs and goals, which means the number of sessions each client needs varies.
Every client needs to start with a foundation session, which is to clarify their goals and ensure we are a good fit.
Short-Term Goals (3-6 Sessions)
Great for addressing a specific challenge, building foundational somatic awareness, or learning practical tools for self-pleasure and communication.
Deeper Transformation (8–12+ sessions):
Recommended for complex challenges, where we unpack long-standing beliefs, scripts and emotions to rewire your relationship with pleasure.
After your foundation session, you will be able to book sessions either as you need them or in a bundle.
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The Foundation Session | 30 Minutes $50 NZD (Credited to your first session or bundle)
One-off Session Prices:
Individual Session | 60 Minutes | $180 NZD
Relationship Session | 90 Minutes | $290 NZD
Bundle Prices:
Introductory Bundle | 4 × 60 Minute Individual Sessions | $550 NZD
Relational Bundle | 2× 60 Minute Individual Sessions, 2× 90 Minute Relational Sessions | $850 NZD
What We Can Work On Together
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Yes. Somatic sex coaching helps you overcome difficulties with reaching orgasm through a body-centred approach that uses experiential practices to quiet mental chatter, expand your sensory awareness, and help your nervous system relax into pleasure.
Rather than focusing solely on orgasm as an isolated goal, we shift away from performance pressure and spectating yourself from the outside so you can fully inhabit your body and build sustainable erotic capacity.
In our work together, we focus on identifying what might be blocking you from reaching climax—whether rooted in physical tension, emotional stress, or past conditioning. Through guided sessions, we integrate breathwork and embodiment practices to help your body relax into higher states of arousal, quiet intrusive thoughts, and stay present in physical sensation.
We incorporate detailed sexual anatomy education and arousal mapping to help you understand your unique pleasure response, including how natural arousal prepares your system for climax.
We also teach practical communication tools so you can express your needs clearly and guide your partner effectively.
To support your progress between sessions, you will receive clear, structured home assignments to explore specific touch, pressure, and self-exploration practices at your own pace in your own environment.
By building positive, safe associations with physical touch and expanding your capacity for pleasure, this process helps you quiet the mind and unlock deeper, more reliable orgasmic experiences.
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Yes, somatic sex coaching helps you overcome erectile challenges and rebuild sexual confidence through a body-centred approach designed for lasting change.
Rather than treating symptoms in isolation, we help you get out of your head and back into your body so you can transform stress into natural arousal and move away from performance pressure toward genuine pleasure and connection.
Through personalised sessions and guided home practices, you will learn the psychoeducation behind your body's arousal patterns and unlearn restrictive sexual scripts. We work on introducing a variety of ways to experience touch, allowing you to expand your possibilities for pleasure beyond traditional expectations.
Using evidence-based practices like Sensate Focus therapy, we create a low-pressure environment where your nervous system can feel safe to relax into the experience.
You will also develop practical communication tools so you can express your desires clearly and teach your partner how to support you.
Whether you are navigating performance anxiety or managing physical erectile changes alongside medical care, this process expands your erotic capacity and helps you become a more present, confident lover.
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Yes. Somatic sex coaching offers a body-centred approach to help you overcome painful intercourse by addressing how your nervous system experiences arousal, safety, and physical touch.
In sessions and take-home exercises, there will be a focus on creating safety and arousal.
You’ll receive education on sexual anatomy and arousal mapping, and learn how natural arousal expands tissue, increases lubrication, and physically prepares your body for comfort.
When working with couples, we focus on improving attunement, clear communication, and pacing so your partner learns exactly how to support your body's specific comfort needs without pressure.
By building positive, safe associations with physical touch and expanding your erotic capacity, this process helps your nervous system heal so you can reclaim pleasurable, pain-free intimacy.
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Yes, somatic sex coaching can help you navigate your relationship with porn. Rather than relying on shame, guilt, or forced abstinence, body-based coaching explores the underlying emotional or nervous system needs that porn use fulfils, such as stress relief, emotional regulation, or connection.
By tuning into body cues and emotional triggers before the impulse takes over, you can learn to track the subtle signals that lead you toward screen use.
Coaching gently reconnects your physical body to sensory pleasure, touch, and imagination, expanding your capacity for arousal beyond visual stimulation.
This body-first approach helps reduce performance pressures and builds comfort with vulnerability, allowing you to transfer desire and presence back into satisfying self-pleasure or partnered intimacy.
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Yes, somatic sex coaching can significantly help relieve performance anxiety around intimacy.
Performance anxiety usually stems from the pressure to achieve a specific physical outcome, which triggers the body’s threat response and pulls you out of sensory presence.
Body-based coaching helps shift your focus away from performing, pleasing, or overthinking, redirecting your awareness back into physical sensation and self-soothing.
By learning to recognise where you hold tension and applying nervous system regulation tools in and out of the bedroom, you can quiet the internal critic and build confidence in both self-pleasure and partnered connection.